When Mother’s Day Is Different
Hello, my dear readers,
Today’s a special post because of Mother’s Day weekend. Sometimes Mother’s Day is a happy occasion, sometimes it’s sorrowful, and sometimes it’s a combination of emotions. And so, this post will address different kinds of Mother’s Days. 👩👧👦
Loss of a Mother
Some people have unfortunately been separated from their mother through placement in foster care, death, or various other reasons. Others are estranged from their mother, or their relationship is contentious.
In each of those situations, I recommend finding a competent therapist to help with the healing process. For strained relationships, the therapist may have conjoint sessions if appropriate. The therapist can also make referrals to other resources, such as group therapy. (See the posts, “What Is Wise Counsel and Good Therapy?” “Why You Need a Therapist ASAP,” and “3 Essential Steps To Heal from Childhood Trauma.”)
Additionally, consider the following suggestions if applicable:
- Journaling thoughts and feelings
- Doing self-care (See “6 Effective Ways To Manage Stress” for ideas.)
- Commemorating by visiting the gravesite or creating a musical slideshow of photos (See “4 Crucial Sources of Comfort During the Grieving Process” and “Coping with the Death of a Loved One.”)
- Giving a card to a mother figure, such as a relative, stepmother, or foster mother
Loss of a Child
The loss of a child is one of the most heartbreaking tragedies ever. The grief is unfathomable. “Visitor From Heaven” by Twila Paris and “21 Years” by TobyMac have lyrics, which reflect the dichotomy of hope and pain regarding the death of a child. Another heartfelt song is “With Hope” by Steven Curtis Chapman, who tragically lost his daughter.
Grief manifests in abortion too. Restored by Grace offers private sessions, small groups, and other services to promote healing.
Another reason Mother’s Day may be painful is a loss of contact with adult children, who are making unhealthy choices. Jesus told the parable of the prodigal son to illustrate the unconditional love of God and to instill hope for parents, who are praying for restoration of their relationship with their children.
The list of parent-child issues is endless. What about the mother, whose parental rights were terminated by a judge because she’s deemed incapable? Of course, the best interest of the child is a priority, but since this is a post about the myriad of emotions Mother’s Day evokes, the question is: how does she feel on Mother’s Day?
Again, in every circumstance, I recommend finding a competent therapist to provide individual sessions and link to a support group and other resources. You may also be interested in the post, “Mending a Broken Heart: 8 Methods to Ease Your Pain.”
Some women have an unfulfilled desire for motherhood, and so Mother’s Day sadly pierces their heart. One suggestion that may provide a bit of salve for a wounded heart, is the Tutum Global Childlessness Alliance, which “centers the involuntarily childless experience with wellness content, therapy, and tools…strengthening our emotional well-being.”
Another suggestion is volunteering with youth, who would benefit from a positive role model. Organizations, such as Big Brothers Big Sisters of America, National CASA/GAL, YMCA of the USA, Boys and Girls Club of America, residential treatment facilities, and faith-based organizations, have opportunities to mentor and care for the next generation.
Women with Postpartum Depression
The CDC reports that 1 in 8 women experience symptoms of depression after childbirth. If this applies to you, please call 911 for any life-threatening situations, 988 for any suicidal thoughts, and call or text the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline at 1-833-9-HELP4MOMS (1-833-943-5746). Furthermore, be sure to see a physician and mental health professional. The article, “40 Ways To Support Mothers with Postpartum Depression” by the Riyah Speaks lifestyle and wellness blog, has helpful tips for friends and family.
A Celebration Together
If you’re able to celebrate with your mother or child, here are some ideas.
Parents will enjoy cuddling with their small children and reading “Why Did God Make Little Ones?” by Geoffrey and Ramya Black. This new children’s book is full of beautiful illustrations, including a mother tucking her baby in bed at the end.
And for Mother’s Day gifts, here are some great ideas:
- gem+bone jewelry
- Bijou Indochine Jewelry. You can order online or go to the new store at 1107 Montana Avenue in Santa Monica.
- Ladybug Designs
Above all, no matter how your Mother’s Day looks this year, remember God’s unconditional love for you (Psalm 27:10). (For more details, see the posts, “Why Selfless Esteem Is Better Than Self-Esteem” and “The Real Truth About God.”)
I close with a light-hearted, humorous ode to mothers and mother figures with “William Tell Momisms” by Anita Renfroe. Enjoy. 💐
All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible, New King James Version®. Copyright © 1984 by Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville, TN. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
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